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I am scraps of paper, rumours, bulletins and gossip forming a substance of crumbling pieces
I am peroxide, naproxyen and valarean root.
I was a daughter, a friend, a hope. I am estranged, entangled and strangled. The girl on the end of the phone
I am the one when you canapos;t help but look.
I was never pretty and I was always fucked up.
itsoundspretentiousbutitapos;strue.

Iapos;ve never told a lie and felt guilty.
And thatapos;s the most honest thing youapos;ll ever hear me say.

1.Deadlines haunt me like ghosts.
2.Oldfriends follow me around like shadows
3.and the ultimate poltergeist that I call love

...

well lets just say I wont be putting cards down any time soon.
a hand kept secret is a secret sworn and marked on a grave.

I like to spill truths like wine on carpet of a friends living room. Reveal, or stain.
either way youapos;ll still get the awkward silences and glances like you just shot someone
Nobody wants to say a word, in case you shoot them too.


Youapos;re all so ignorant, donapos;t ask
Donapos;t pray
Donapos;t pry
You donapos;t want to know.
No, really.
You donapos;t want to know.


Take me home.

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My engineering group usually meets on Tuesdays at 2:30 in the library. This Tuesday involved schedule shenanigans, so that didnapos;t go through. I tried to make arrangements with the rest of my group to meet on Thursday at 2:30, but nobodyapos;s here which means

a) They are all incredibly late (again)
b) They forgot
c) Since only one person ever actually said Thursday might work, they are busy

Either way, I am now stuck in the library. The single exit is being loosely guarded by 4+ zombies. How is this going to work? I wonder...

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It sure sounds like you had a hectic first day, I am so sorry about that, that is so horrible I am going to give you some advice that I have learned helps ALOT I think it is so good that you brought stuff for them to do, and you had ideas for stuff, I would have been freaking out if I didnapos;t have time to read the lesson plan, and had to think of things on my own. How HORRIBLE But just remember students of that age like and NEED organization. So everything that you are planning to do, you need to re-evaluate it and find ways to make it more organized. The students need to know WHAT to do BEFORE they are given ANYTHING So first you read them a story, that was good make sure you always tell them what you are going to be doing, donapos;t ever ask (and this goes for ALL grades and ages). Tell them that Where the Wild Things are is your FAVORITE book, and you want to tell it to them. Be VERY animated with it, which I KNOW you can do. Ask them lots of questions while you are reading it to make sure that they are paying attention. (what is this guys name, what do your parents do to punish you when you are bad, if you were having a dream like that, where would you choose to go etc). Also when kids act up and need to be re-directed, it is always a good idea to praise the kids who are acting the way they should, and make sure everyone hears you. "Oh wow, I really like how suzie is working so quietly, and following directions" Or use a whole group of kids "I really like how everyone at this table is ready to learn, and they are not (insert misbehavior of other kids here)" Also, its good to have some sort of rewards system. Go to like office max or something, get some tickets, had them out for good behavior, and tell kids that you will draw names for someone to pick a prize (haha and have some prizes from like the 99 cent store or something). Also ok, your next plan of action, have the kids make some monsters. SUCH A GREAT IDEA BUT....again everything needs to be more organized than you think. Tell everyone that you are not going to hand anything out until everyone knoe what to do. Explain the rules FULLY before you pass out anything, especially glue have previous things cut out and such, so as if you are making their monsters. Or hand everyone the same two colored pieces of paper. DON"T give them the googly eyes. Tell them when they are done with their monster to come get the googly eyes from you. Hahaha.

As far as lunch and recess goes DO NOT EVER let them stay in the room with you, walk them out to the playground and do not let them come back, that is ALWAYS A NO-NO Ask the office to show you where the teachers lounge is, and go in there during your breaks, or out to your car.

YOU DID JUST FINE I want you to like the little kids, cuz I know that they are fun, and so are you. I think you can bring soooo many good things and fun things into a classroom. You just have to have the right tools to give to the students to keep them in line. Wait a little bit, and get some more experience, and then try 1st and other younger grades again. The more you deal with kids, the more comfortable you are going to be :) Just keep it up If you need any other advice, let me know :)

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Anyone reading this is invited to come see my work at the Illingworth Kerr Gallery in the Alberta College of Art and Design, Calgary, Alberta, if theyapos;re anywhere close to that location on Friday and Saturday :)� Iapos;ll have 5 pieces up

I find the this show to be one of the more encouraging things to happen this year.� I guess they saw my work up somewhere else in the college and wanted me to have it in the gallery as well, which makes me feel good when Iapos;ve been feeling so discouraged with my art to begin with.� Iapos;ve been experimenting a lot and nothingapos;s really been turning out for me, so it makes me really happy that other people might like what Iapos;m doing.

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There wasnapos;t much Jack Oapos;Neill remembered. He remembered Anubisapos; ships in orbit and Daniel threatening to look into the ancient database and, with no other choice, sticking his own head in that thing instead. Then things were a bit fuzzy. There was something about taking a cargo ship and Antarctica, but they were more like notions than memory.

He groaned, hand coming to his face as light streamed into the window of the cabin. He was fairly certain he wasnapos;t at home - his bed was more comfortable than this - and the SGC was located under a giante mountain. He took a moment before opening his eyes and staired up at the exposed wooden plants of the cabin ceiling. Okay.... Jack sat up, reaching for his P-90, but finding nothing. He glanced around the bed, then the room before reaching for his side arm which was also missing. Not good.

Jack was up quickly and checking what he did have. He still had his combat vest, but all the C4 and supplies were gone except his combat knife. With a looming sense of dread, Jack took a moment to look around the cabin. Clothes, money, and food. Out of the window he could see a field. The thought that maybe SG-1 was offworld and heapos;d just had some really strong drink the night before crossed his mind, but the lack of his weapons concerned him.

Cautiously, Jack pulled open the door of the cabin and stepped out. The place looked similar to a lot of planets heapos;d visited, but he couldnapos;t place this one in particular. He decided to go for a little walk.
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LIFE IS REALLY UNFAIR AND SO STUPID

Kidding, but seriously, no matter what you do you lose- sleep with him and he wonapos;t call you back, donapos;t sleep with him and he wonapos;t call you back. Orrrr, more on my level, hold his hand at punk rock show and he calls you and then he asks you on a date and then calls the next day to say that he doesnapos;t want you to get the wrong impression and ummmm maybe dinner is too much like a date. YEAH, WELL, I thought North Carolina was a stupid state to be from anyway

Anyway, you probably remember this happening approx one week ago, only on a less grand, but more heart breaking level. I was too sad to go to work for one whole day, in addition to a whole sunday where all I wanted to do was go from being curled up in bed to being curled up in a church pew. I really did want to do that, I still canapos;t think of anything more comforting, just rolling around in a pew, listening to someone give a good sermon and people singing big songs about love and how Great things are and just being sad sad sad. But umm that catastrophe can be directly linked to my out of control hormones and raging pms, GOD, I AM SUCH A WOMAN ALL THE TIME. Well, this proves my point, no matter how much I lower my standards, Iapos;m gunna die alone and 100 unloved, lifeapos;s ruff and I hate everyone, jk jk jk.

I just want ot leave you with this thought is MEN SUCK, THEN YOU DIE. BYE

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Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr The anger and pure frustration is taking over my body like an infection or desease through my vains of blood and horror of anger. I RULE THE WORLD AND FANDOM WITH MY ANGER AND INSANITY TO REACH MY GOAL OF DEATH AND DISTRUCTION. My music I write is so fucking heavier and faster like my old days of anger and violence but without the violence at this day and steriod taking through needle injection to fuel my anger GAH Come on world I take you all on you BASTARDS The folf is in for a kill and hungry for it RAWR

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